MonogaWho?

I think it's pretty safe to say monogamy is not natural for me. I am in no way opposed to the lifestyle. I see the value in it and I am more than capable of living a happy, fulfilled life monogamously. But I can say, quite confidently, that it is not my natural tendency.

Part of me wants to say it isn't anyone's natural tendency, but I can see that isn't true. A lot of people really, truly, in the deepest parts of their souls and hearts and... loins believe monogamy is the only way to love. I've had enough conversations with those people to know that they cannot and will not ever view things any differently. They do not believe in anything else.

I understand what hurts people about the idea of sharing. I understand the sentiment of feeling like you aren't enough for your partner [or feeling like you should be enough]. I think, overall, it's easy for someone who is polyamorous, in any capacity, to understand and sympathize with those who are monogamous... in a way that seems impossible for a monogamous person to sympathize with someone who is polyamorous.

And that leads me to wonder how, honestly, HOW do mono-poly couples manage? I know they can and I know they do. I've looked into this more than enough to see that to be true. This is just where it's hard for me to put myself in their shoes. How do you live a lifestyle you don't truly believe in? I mean not, "Yeah, I believe in it, I see how it works, just don't wish to actually live it," but the kind of "No, I don't understand how you can live this way, I don't understand how you can love one person and want to be with anyone else, if I'm not enough for you then you don't really love me but.... okay, I guess if you need this, I'll go along with it so I don't lose you" mentality. HOW?

Limitations do not make me happy. They do not make me feel special or unique. They are not "proof" of my feelings. I am more than willing to live with limitations for the sake of people or relationships that are important to me. Because, at the end of the day, life in general is about priorities and making decisions based on the big picture. I cannot say my natural, sincere feeling is that monogamy is what makes me happiest, though.

Sidenote: I also don't like labels. I don't like defined boxes. I like the freedom to be and feel and do what is best for the situation, without defining it or forcing it into a specific "role." It is what it is, and that's all that it is. Beyond that, just chill.